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Pub Crawling

I went out on a pubcrawl last week with an awesome buddy of mine. Codename Owlbear is a giant of a man who has the mere definition of "An empty barrel" inside him, only used to accumulate vast quantities of alcohol. My theory is he needs it to produce bellowing laughter and disdain for most of humanity. Seriously, who can blame him?

He's also a bit touchy (hurrr) with physical contact.

We started the pub crawl in an Irish bar called Waxy o'Connors near Leicester square. It's a great and vast bar, littered with quaint Irish paraphernalia. "Druidic" Codename Owlbear called it. And one can see his point there as the large (and fake we found out) tree dominates the centre of the pub. Combined with brown tones it creates this weird earthy feel.

And that's as far as the drivel about the design goes since I'm not an interior decorator, and neither do I care much for it.

The next trip took us to Chinatown, where situated among Dim Sum bars and windows covered in mummified ducks, gives way to De Hems. De Hems is a Dutch bar, and don't ask us what the connection is with Chinatown as it makes as much sense as a bacon shop in Jerusalem.

De Hems is a great bar though if you're looking for Dutch or Belgian speciality beers. And as you may know, Belgian speciality beers usually come in 8 to 10 degrees so they offer a nice kick. I had a Kwak, a quaint little beer in a glass what is likely even more quaint. Unfortunately it didn't come in one of those wooden holsters. Probably on purpose since otherwise I would have gladly given it a new home. Codename Bourbon is an alcoholic magpie you see. 

I recommended the Chimay Blue to my vastly superior drinking buddy. A Chimay is a Belgian trappist, a sort of dark authentic ale and one of the best of its kind as well. A drink of depth and subtle favour. With it's 8.5 degrees also not a drink for the weak.

The prices in the bar are reasonable as well. Still expensive, but not as bad as you would think for imported beer. Dutch food, although bordering on greasy insanity, has some really great beer snacks; all deep fried and full of cholesterol. Allow me to recommend you readers the Bitterballs in particular.

We also met some French bloke, who managed to pack all of his local stereotypes in one gay package. It was so remarkable that I offered him a white napkin. I was told his kind has great affinity in its use: both in war, as behind closed doors. Codename Bugbear seemed quite amused by that fact. Although he may have just been admiring the well-pronounced bosom of a nearby patron.

After De Hems we visited yet another Irishly themed bar called the Toucan. For those who can't place the link already (You may now drown your head in a bucket of the black stuff if that's the case) It's obviously a guiness bar. The pub packs a good guiness and certainly some of the best I've drank in London. But having said that ... I can't think of anything else to add in its advantage either. 

After all those traditional bars we kicked it up a notch and decided to visit two of London's nearby Rock and Metal pubs. The first one was called the Intrepid Fox. It's the reanimated corpse of a previous bar with the same name. A seedy and shambling shadow of its former namesake's glory. A bar so seedy, you probably have a one in ten chance exiting the bar with herpes. The usual tatted up tiny barmaid was there as well, I barely recognized her at first since for once she was not dancing on top of the bar like a 10-year old girl trying to please daddy. The bar also happened to be visited that day by a fourty-to-fifty year-old typical English bloke .... with vampire teeth. It would've been freaking hilarious if it wasn't so damn pathetic and embarrassing. I can imagine the discussion at home:

"Where is daddy mommy?" "

"Daddy is just being a ponce looking for some emo arse atm sweety" 

Even IF you would happen to be a vampire at that age with those looks, it could only be some form of sadistic punishment of a rather cynic God. I'll have to admit though, it takes a certain type of cajones to go about looking like a tosser. ... gay cajones.

For the last bar we went (I'm 100% sure that at that point I more or less crawled my way) to the Crobar. That however turned out to be a bigger disapointment than George Bush writing his own soliloquis. That place was so rundown I think I'm struck with ... amnesia . Truthfully however, that is probably due to being completely and utterly drunk. Although Subject Owlbear informed me all I've missed apparently were "a bunch of fat chicks"

so meh...

Codename Bourbon signing off

The Shoreditch Review

Shoreditch is a nice place to unwind and sample some delectable cocktails. Our latest trip bought us to the not-so-originally-named The Shoreditch venue. From the outside the bar looks, well, ... pretty tacky to be honest with all the bright blue lights. Really the front of this bar would fit in just perfect in Soho.
Inside the decoration is veritable mix and match. You can find fake African statuettes, a ship's figurehead, heck, there is even a dead tiger on the ceiling. First I thought I was already drunk and mistaking the floor with the ceiling (again) but nope, there was a real tiger skin bolted to the ceiling.
The theme seems to be exotic, but more in the sense of cheap exotic fruit juice that you buy at those Turkish shops than real outlandish and beautiful art. Shoreditch art students failing again. Have I also mentioned there's a dead tiger pelt on the ceiling? Inevitably staring right through your soul.
For some reason there's also packets of ice on the floor. Go figure.

Oh yeh, the drinks. The Shoreditch is so far the only cocktail bar where we've managed to uncontrollably giggle and roar after reading the menu. We might as well have been reading the Joker's evil cocktail menu. If you ever want to waste your monthly wages people, just go to this bar and order yourself a Tiger's Head. Cost? 800£. It's ok though, because you can share it with 10 ... Seriously though, for that price I expect to bathe in my drinks, poured by a harem of virgins dressed as princess Leila (You know which dress, truly you know) while being read, ... no, cantated, poetry from William Blake.
Anyway we decided NOT to take the Tiger's Head and instead opted for a Planet of the Apes and a Bees Knees. As outrageous as some prices were, we got the Happy Hour deal and it was only 10£ for those two. For that price we found the drinks very agreeable and acceptable.
The Planet of the Apes is a cocktail made from rum and banana juice. A pretty well balanced cocktail with the taste of rum right there in the front seat of your taste buds. It also came in an awesome porcelain barrel mug. I've never seen Subject T look so happy except maybe for that one time he had dozed off on the tube, dreaming of punching David Cameron square in the mouth.

The Bees Knees is an excellent summer drink. The glass was frosty it almost came straight from the ice-age.  Although the menu says it's a cocktail of gin and honey, there's a very pleasant taste of lime all throughout the drink. Turning this into a marvellous refreshing and smooth drink.

We had a great time in The Shoreditch, apart from mocking the drinks and furniture we leaned back enjoying our cocktails. Meanwhile nodding to the beats of some smooth reggae. Unfortunately we were told that the princess is in another bar



Subject Bourbon signing off

Heineken: The Date

Normally the effect of lager on Subject T has about the same result as feeding a gremlin after midnight. Really it makes smuggling him in bars that much more fun and challenging. Also, in all honestly yours truly may have likened Heineken to less than reputable liquids in the past...

But still ...

We've recently came upon this video and it is worth watching, you can watch it here:



Worth mentioning about this whoppingly big-budget commercial is that it was shot here in London, and features an interesting marriage between a Chinatown restaurant-annex-theatre with a funky (and franky awesome) Bollywood tune from my local Indian take-away.
It is noteworthy to showcase beer and lager in a setting that many would rather link to the world of mixers and champagne instead. Inadvertently deeming beer more fit to the seedy underworld of dark-lit pubs and sports events. Both Stella and Heineken are doing a good job advertising beer as a social and responsible drink, and they deserve merit for that.

And with that, cheers!




Subject Bourbon, sponsored by Heineken, signing off.

G-g-g-g-g-Ghost Ship @ The Shacklewell Arms

What a fantastic day. I understand that Bourbon was busy elsewhere and that Ms Bourbon was involved,  so I seem to be doing a lot of lone drinking at the moment. I am okay with this in my pursuit of the single life,  for what can you do other than enjoy life? And read books. And fall down drunk. Still okay with this.

The Shacklewell Arms:  There was a free BBQ and the promise of lots of Stoner music. That was the hook,  the hook ran deep. Bone marrow deep. The pub looks rundown, but don't fooled by that appearance or if you see me in the street - we prefer terms such as 'careworn' and 'character'. The BBQ was provided by the Pacific Social Club based in Hackney. It was, a damn fine BBQ. The secret ingredient to all BBQs is now yoghurt. It's not a joke. Get some ground pine nuts in there too and a bit of salad with a bit of meat. Yoghurt. huh. It makes everything delicious ... apart from yoghurt itself.


The music was via a DJ who bore a slight resemblance to Gandalf  The White just with some tats and a vest.. It was very awesome. I got to read Carl Sagan's Contact and rock out to stoner and prog rock and drink bitter. Honestly, it was that awesome. Most importantly, no one gave a crap whether you lived or died. They were there for one thing only. The BBQ. Maybe to talk toot among themselves, but the BBQ was the hook.

There was a good selection of beers available; the usual lagers, guiness, cider, two ales, one very nice bitter. One ale and the bitter were from Adnams. Copper Dragon is worth an honorable mention here and it is worth seeking this tasty ale out, it is very nice. Very, very nice and most palatable. I confess, this day I drank to excess and woke up at home at 5am facedown, minus my magic jeans and surrealistic underpants that had dissapeared at some point leading to an added deeper layer of confusion.


Having said that, enjoyed two pints of Adnams Ghost Ship and more so when it was poured into a proper old pint jug. Those glasses are great.  Look to your right for a glimpse of a great glass. When you're done you can either steal it or pretend its a hand grenade: These glasses are much tougher than the regular ones and much easier on the wrist - so you can drink and fight all day with them.


Ghost Ship is a pale ale. My gods, it is a refreshing drink. It's like a lemon and a lime fucked and the bastard offspring became an angel and then that angelic 'lemime' got squished and put into a beer. It's a very, very fine beer. Its very mild - i guess you could complain that it doesn't have an 'Ale' character but quite frankly, I would punch you in the mouth until you accept that it is delicious, packed with citrus taste and Vitamin R for Refreshment.


I actually recommend you get some of this down you as soon as you can for this reason; Adnams Ghost Ship is a seasonal beer and only available from May to October. They do not make it all the time. They should. It's really nice. Hot sunny day, neck a pint of this down. Cold winter day, neck a pint of this down for breakfast. Everything is better this way. Even those awkward mornings.


It cost me £3.60 for a pint which is a bit much really but what the hell, anything is better than a lager. Big bag of Twiglets cost me £1, but you know what makes up for all of that?


That's right. The music was excellent and, did I mention that there was a free BBQ? A really good BBQ?


I heartily rate Adnams Ghost Ship with a 9/10. Now GO my sweet tumours and get some of that in you. Your taste buds will dance the Dance Macabre in praise


T signing off with much power, peace and love

Drunk Geeks @ Drunken Monkey

For once I traded in Codename T for Misses Bourbon. And I'll have to admit I finally had someone good to look at. After all, Codename T is the person who single-handedly turned a paperbag into not only a valid, but also a necessitated fashion accessory for him. But I jest, Codename T is a character, chiseled out of pure marble by the fists of Hephaestus himself.
But I digress. Misses Bourbon is an expert in Asian food and Dim Sum in particular. An appropriated feat seeing as we were headed to The Drunken Monkey. A cocktail bar annex Dim Sum restaurant in Shoreditch. From the start the bar was set high. But did Drunken Monkey pass our gruelling tests?
Short answer? Yes, although not without shortcomings.


The Venue:

The bar/restaurant looks great with the red Chinese lanterns and wooden finish on the tables and walls. The music was modern and non-Asian which is actually a perfect decision as Asian music would have made it REALLY tacky. The venue was a bit loud but altogether it had a great atmosphere which surely made Codename Bourbon score points.


The Food:

All dishes came were well proportioned and were overall quite tasty.
"The Siu Mai came from frozen packages" Misses Bourbon immediately muttered as she dug into the first of the batch. And sure enough, I believe I have some of these stuck in my freezer somewhere. Way On brand I believe? VERY Bad Monkey. I myself was not entirely impressed by the chicken lettuce parcel, somehow getting a separate plate with 4 lettuce leaves makes me wonder what I'm supposed to do with those? A few more cocktails and I could see myself throw them as the new vegetarian frisbees. (ninja-style baby) The vegetables in it though were nice and crunchy and the dish itself tasted good, but it felt a bit too much like eating a chicken noodle soup ... with lettuce leaves.

The chicken wings were nicely fried and salty. The ribs were succulent and delicious, and best of all: they came with lots of meat to gnaw off. That's why I order ribs you know, to gnaw off juicy marinated meat. Hate it when you get those tiny bony ribs where you feel you need to suck the marrow out just out of sheer necessity. Cheers for that Monkey, excellent job.
The piece-de-resistance though was surely the fried squid. Doused with just the exact right amount of chili, garlic and salt, yum. Then fried to perfection. The bowl of squid was in my honest opinion of a higher quality than what you would get in some Chinatown places. And Misses Bourbon has a similar opinion.


The Drinks:

But the drinks, because that's why I came here.

Black Rose:

Black Rose is a cocktail made from Four Roses bourbon, cherry liqueur, and a finish of prosecco.
Overall this was a well-balanced cocktail and I loved how even though this screams sweet, the prosecco gave it a mild sour finish. All flavours are well in-tune and it makes for a lovely drink! It looks good to with the three marinated cherries topped on the ice.






Simian Features:




This is the house signature drink, it's an exotic cocktail made from El Dorado rum, with pineapple and passion fruit juice, topped-up with soda and with fresh basil leaves.

What struck me first was how good this drink looks with the passion seeds. A real eye-catcher of a drink.
The taste itself is wonderful. A rich fruity taste which again is not too sweet, a hint of sourness from the passion fruit too. The basil gave it a more spicy hint which became much more dominant as the drink was finishing. A sad realization as this drink has now become one of my favourites.


My only negative point was perhaps a bit too much ice in the drinks (does a diet coke really need 10 ice-cubs?) And in the case of the Simian Features, perhaps not crushed enough. But let those rather minor details not get us carried away from the main finding, namely the fact that Drunken Monkey serves some class-A drinks that soothe the taste-buds, even while dining on Dim-sum!

Drunk Geeks @ Bar Polski

In a previous article we mentioned finding Spiritual Bar tucked away in a side-street in Camden. In the same category of Hidden Gems we present to you: Bar Polski near New Oxford Street. The bar could possibly not be hidden any worse. In a side-street of a side-street that would make the most notorious rapist glimmer with anticipation.

As the name suggests Bar Polski is a very modern and stylish Polish bar dedicated to wodka spirits and mixers. Their assortment is absolutely incredible, ranging from pure distilled potato-based vodka to the famous Zubrowka to melon-flavoured spirits. Polish bar has it all.

The bar itself is extremely stylish with lounge-based music and has the option to try out some polish-based local cuisine. Drunk Geeks surely recommend the Bigos.

Our only complaint? Mixing the spirits with just soda gets tiring rather fast. There was a bit of a lack of variation from the mixers from our bartender. Or a lack of passion for his trade?

Codename Bourbon signing off.